Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
two years ago...
this is exactly how i feel. :p now, i could only smile at the thought
"I am a masochist. I hunger for pain. I inflict pain in my heart hoping that this could either heal me or at least numb me.
After more than a year of being apart, I have not totally healed. Im still hurting. I know that we could not be together and if given the chance that I will be forced to choose to be with him or not, I think I will choose not being with him. But why am I still hurting.
Iam hurting because i have not totally let go. I am hurting because I am still bitter. I am hurting because there was no closure. I am hurting because we ended up in a standstill. I am hurting because everything seemed so vague and it ended up abruptly. I am hurting because I misread him. I am hurting because there were no apologies. I am hurting because there were no explanations. I am hurting because he seems to be happy with her while I m here all by myself. I am hurting because I thought that he cares for me and would be sensitive of my feelings but it seems like he is not. But more than anything, I am hurting because I was wrong about him. "
"I am a masochist. I hunger for pain. I inflict pain in my heart hoping that this could either heal me or at least numb me.
After more than a year of being apart, I have not totally healed. Im still hurting. I know that we could not be together and if given the chance that I will be forced to choose to be with him or not, I think I will choose not being with him. But why am I still hurting.
Iam hurting because i have not totally let go. I am hurting because I am still bitter. I am hurting because there was no closure. I am hurting because we ended up in a standstill. I am hurting because everything seemed so vague and it ended up abruptly. I am hurting because I misread him. I am hurting because there were no apologies. I am hurting because there were no explanations. I am hurting because he seems to be happy with her while I m here all by myself. I am hurting because I thought that he cares for me and would be sensitive of my feelings but it seems like he is not. But more than anything, I am hurting because I was wrong about him. "
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
all is well
its over. finally, im done. i just finished reading book 7. fine! i wont write anything about the story so as not to spoil the excitement of those who are still reading it.yeah, its a good book. harry's saga had a good ending. but the epilogue was too good that it bordered to 'cornballism'
reading the last book was really quite an experience. its not for the frailhearted. ok, i might be exaggerating but, hey thats how it was for me. i was into tears after reading just a few chapters. the 'escape' to the burrow was really a page-turner, and so was every part of their journey. i think that the start of the battle at hogwarts was a bit funny though. well...
finally, its over. all is well.
harry potter fans, no more book launching to look forward to. no more anticipation. gone were the days when we would ask about reservations at national or powerbooks or fully booked. we all have the complete set now, nesting in our bookshelves waiting to be summoned again. accio, book 1!
------------------------
its also over. after 5 long years, my phone, together with my sim, finally gave up. just like my hypothesis about harry and voldemort, the 2 tried to outlast each other. but here, both gave up. so im back to my pre-cellphone days. i dont know when would i buy a new one but im sure not in the next few days. it actually feels quite good not to have a phone =) no distractions
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
despedida
huuyy, picture daw. tingnan nyo, si pinky tsaka si mau lang nakatingin.
o ayan, may energy na sina dangs at nanie. kaya lang etong kamay ni mau, panira.
o eto na talaga
eto ang despedida ni pinkee aka blue aka mara *wink wink* evil grin*
hulaan nyo kung anong paboritong kulay nya.
see you around pinks!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
sabado sa cubao
we had our surprise party for dez last saturday and im glad the gang was complete. we had dinner at bellini's where olie took nice shots and coffee at gj where he took more nice shots. we had our usual 'presentation of gifts' and laughed our hearts out at the special gift from the 3. artistic abilities were put to test with the scrapbook making contest which, of course, lala aced. we stayed there until the crew told us that they were about to close.
after a looooong prodding, lala finally agreed to take us to pasig where we drank and talked till morning. peer pressure worked for kim that time so we had free breakfast at jollibee. but it was only 530 in the morning and breakfast wont be served until 6. nice! so we waited again and after some time, we finally had breakfast.
it was a nice way to spend the weekend. after about a year or 2, we were again complete. and we had nice photos to remind us about the fun that night =)
tinedyer
may crush ako ngayon. noong lunes, nakasabay ko sya sa fx at magkatabi kami sa likod. kaya lang, ginawa nya akong tigapaypay. hmpf! kakainis kasi si mamang drayber, hindi inaayos ang sasakyan kaya ayan tuloy, ang hina ng aircon sa likod. magmula yata cubao hanggang makati, hindi ako tumigil sa kakapaypag.
anyway, mabalik tayo kay crush. hindi sya gwapo. hindi ka magsesecond look dahil sa mukha nya kundi dahil sa get-up nya. laging naka-jeans at naka-rubber shoes. hindi sneakers ha, yung rubber shoes na mukhang pangbadminton. tapos madalas na naka-batik na shirt at naka-backpack. tapos naka-earphones. ironically, ayoko kay jake cuenca pero narealize ko kamukha pala nya. argh!
una ko syang napansin nung makatabi ko sya sa sasakyan. pagkatapos yun noon ng UAAP championship between ateneo at ust. may hawak kasi syang inquirer na nakabandera sa sports section ang pagkapanalo ng ust. sabi ko sa isip ko, uy nagbabasa sya ng dyaryo. medyo maayos ang suot nya noon, jeans at shirt na may collar. tapos napansin ko ang buhok nya, buhok beatles. sabi ko, hmmm kakaiba. kasi sa pila, ang mga lalaki, nakaMakati get-up: plantsadong pantalon, plantsadong long sleeves at makintab na leather shoes. eh syempre ako, i have an eye for people who dare to be different.
tapos ayon, lagi ko syang nakakasabay sa pila pag medyo late na ako. pero lately, maaga na ako pumapasok kaya hindi ko na sya nakikita. kaya natuwa ako noong lunes. hindi ko nga napansin na nasa likod ko pala sya. nakita ko na lang sya noong pasakay na ako at sya ang kasunod ko. hay, kilig! gusto ko tuloy kumanta ng...
love, love, love
there's nothing you cant do that cant be done
nothing you cant sing that cant be sung
nothing that you cant say but you cant learn how to play the game
its easy........
all you need is love
all you need is love
anyway, mabalik tayo kay crush. hindi sya gwapo. hindi ka magsesecond look dahil sa mukha nya kundi dahil sa get-up nya. laging naka-jeans at naka-rubber shoes. hindi sneakers ha, yung rubber shoes na mukhang pangbadminton. tapos madalas na naka-batik na shirt at naka-backpack. tapos naka-earphones. ironically, ayoko kay jake cuenca pero narealize ko kamukha pala nya. argh!
una ko syang napansin nung makatabi ko sya sa sasakyan. pagkatapos yun noon ng UAAP championship between ateneo at ust. may hawak kasi syang inquirer na nakabandera sa sports section ang pagkapanalo ng ust. sabi ko sa isip ko, uy nagbabasa sya ng dyaryo. medyo maayos ang suot nya noon, jeans at shirt na may collar. tapos napansin ko ang buhok nya, buhok beatles. sabi ko, hmmm kakaiba. kasi sa pila, ang mga lalaki, nakaMakati get-up: plantsadong pantalon, plantsadong long sleeves at makintab na leather shoes. eh syempre ako, i have an eye for people who dare to be different.
tapos ayon, lagi ko syang nakakasabay sa pila pag medyo late na ako. pero lately, maaga na ako pumapasok kaya hindi ko na sya nakikita. kaya natuwa ako noong lunes. hindi ko nga napansin na nasa likod ko pala sya. nakita ko na lang sya noong pasakay na ako at sya ang kasunod ko. hay, kilig! gusto ko tuloy kumanta ng...
love, love, love
there's nothing you cant do that cant be done
nothing you cant sing that cant be sung
nothing that you cant say but you cant learn how to play the game
its easy........
all you need is love
all you need is love
minsan...
aalis na si blue. magreresign na din si green guru. si henyo gustong lumipat. si kulot naman, nasa puso talaga ang paglipad. si kanang-kamay, naiisip na din ang pag-alis. sa tingin ko, pati sina prinsesa at pintasera din. sabi ni dory, nalulungkot siya kasi paunti-unti nang lumiliit ang kulto. ako man nalulungkot.
naaalala ko ang mga panahng pinag-uusapan lang namin sa hapag-kainan ng j5 ang pag-alis. at bago pa man namin mamalayan,isa-isa na naming tinahak ang landas upang harapin ang mga panibagong hamon ng aming kanya-kanyang buhay.
sabi ko nga kay dory, ganoon siguro talaga paglipas ng panahon. hindi maiiwasan ang pagbabago na minsan ang kaakibat ay pagsasarili ng mga magkakaibigan.
kasabay ng paglawak ng ating mundo ang pagbuo ng mga bagong samahang magiging bagong kaagapay sa pagtahak sa buhay. at ang magiging batayan nga ng magandang samahan ay ang kakayahang mapanatili ang ugnayan. totoo nga, ang mahalaga ay hindi ang patutunguhan kundi ang mga karanasan at ang mga kaibigang nakasama sa paglalakbay.
ngunit ngayon, kay bilis maglaho ng kahapon
sanay's huwag kalimutan ang ating mga pinagsamahan
at kung sakaling gipitin ay laging iisipin
na minsan tayo ay naging
tunay na magkaibigan
---minsan, eraserheads
naaalala ko ang mga panahng pinag-uusapan lang namin sa hapag-kainan ng j5 ang pag-alis. at bago pa man namin mamalayan,isa-isa na naming tinahak ang landas upang harapin ang mga panibagong hamon ng aming kanya-kanyang buhay.
sabi ko nga kay dory, ganoon siguro talaga paglipas ng panahon. hindi maiiwasan ang pagbabago na minsan ang kaakibat ay pagsasarili ng mga magkakaibigan.
kasabay ng paglawak ng ating mundo ang pagbuo ng mga bagong samahang magiging bagong kaagapay sa pagtahak sa buhay. at ang magiging batayan nga ng magandang samahan ay ang kakayahang mapanatili ang ugnayan. totoo nga, ang mahalaga ay hindi ang patutunguhan kundi ang mga karanasan at ang mga kaibigang nakasama sa paglalakbay.
ngunit ngayon, kay bilis maglaho ng kahapon
sanay's huwag kalimutan ang ating mga pinagsamahan
at kung sakaling gipitin ay laging iisipin
na minsan tayo ay naging
tunay na magkaibigan
---minsan, eraserheads
Thursday, June 28, 2007
si che
nagsimula ang lahat sa yahoogroups ng klase namin.
meron akong isang kaklase, humihingi ng syllabus sa prof namin. at ang pangalan nya, che guevara. hi klasmeyt!
una kong naisip. astig ah! rebolusyonaryo ba ang mga magulang nito at since guevarra ang apelyido nila, ginawa na nilang che ang first name ng anak nila or is it just pure coincidence?
anyway, inacknowledge syempre ng prof ko ang pagkarebolusyonaryo ng pangalan nya and he said he's happy to have a revolutionary in the class and was asking which among che's ideas he likes most?
unfortunately, hindi nya kilala si che =(
so may isang myembro ng grupo (mula sa dating klase ni sir) who was kind enough to share some info about che. at syempre what can i share, eh di pop info hehe ang pelikula ni gael garcia bernal na motorcycle diaries. :p
at ngayon lang, sabi ni klasmeyt, mukhang magpapalit na sya ng email kasi kinikilabutan na sya kapag naririnig na nya ang pangalang che guevarra.
klasmeyt wag! pero panindigan mo paggamit mo sa pangalan nya haha (just kidding)
============
grabe kapitalismo no? igigisa ka sa sarili mong mantika. naforesee kaya nina mao at che na gagamitin ang mga mukha at imahe nila hindi sa paraang gusto nila kundi sa paraang gusto ng mga nilalabanan nila? inakala kaya nilang makikilala ng mga ordinaryong kabataan ngayon ang mga imaheng ito bilang mga mukha lamang sa tshirt?
hay....
(ang mga imaheng ito ay mula sa internet)
meron akong isang kaklase, humihingi ng syllabus sa prof namin. at ang pangalan nya, che guevara. hi klasmeyt!
una kong naisip. astig ah! rebolusyonaryo ba ang mga magulang nito at since guevarra ang apelyido nila, ginawa na nilang che ang first name ng anak nila or is it just pure coincidence?
anyway, inacknowledge syempre ng prof ko ang pagkarebolusyonaryo ng pangalan nya and he said he's happy to have a revolutionary in the class and was asking which among che's ideas he likes most?
unfortunately, hindi nya kilala si che =(
so may isang myembro ng grupo (mula sa dating klase ni sir) who was kind enough to share some info about che. at syempre what can i share, eh di pop info hehe ang pelikula ni gael garcia bernal na motorcycle diaries. :p
at ngayon lang, sabi ni klasmeyt, mukhang magpapalit na sya ng email kasi kinikilabutan na sya kapag naririnig na nya ang pangalang che guevarra.
klasmeyt wag! pero panindigan mo paggamit mo sa pangalan nya haha (just kidding)
============
grabe kapitalismo no? igigisa ka sa sarili mong mantika. naforesee kaya nina mao at che na gagamitin ang mga mukha at imahe nila hindi sa paraang gusto nila kundi sa paraang gusto ng mga nilalabanan nila? inakala kaya nilang makikilala ng mga ordinaryong kabataan ngayon ang mga imaheng ito bilang mga mukha lamang sa tshirt?
hay....
(ang mga imaheng ito ay mula sa internet)
writer's block
hindi ako makapagsulat ng maayos lately. bat kaya?
ok fine, makapal lang talaga ang mukha ko. feeling ko writer ako and im having that writer's block. yeah right, as if naman ang galing kong magsulat before eh, no?
pero dati naman nakakapagsulat ako ng [feeling ko] maayos ah. tapos dati kahit ordinaryong pangyayari lang sa buhay ko, nakukwento ko ng maayos. hanggang sa pinakamaliit na detalye ha. natutunan ko to sa 199.1 eh. thick description baga. kaya na-appreciate ko ang ginawa namin sa paper namin kay aquino. ikwento mo ba naman ang mga pangyayari sa edsa dos. at hindi lang basta kwento ha, dapat mailarawan mo din kung anong nafifeel mo sa oras na yun, kumusta ang environment, ano nangyayari sa paligid habang nakikipag-usap ka sa kaibigan mo, at marami pang iba. eh ilang araw yun di ba? so ayun, kaya kung magkwento ako [noon], hay maiimagine mo kung ano talaga nangyayari. pero ngayon, huhu...
ay, isang hypotheses ko nga pala. pumupurol na ang memory ko. di ba sabi nga nila pag hindi mo laging ginagamit ang utak mo, pumupurol ito? feeling ko nangyayari sa akin ngayon ang epekto nito.
argh, feeling ko nadevelop ko to sa dati kong trabaho (gosh, blamestorming, thanks vhang hehe). pero feeling ko talaga kasi pag naiiinis ako dati sa mga taong tanong ng tanong, ang sagot ko hindi ko alam. kung may kausap akong hindi ko gusto, i would pretend na hindi ko alam ang itatanong nya. magaling akong magtanga-tangahan. eh syempre di ba, to cut the inquiry and the conversation, eh di magkunwari ka na lang na hindi mo alam. hanggang yun nasanay na ako sa kaka-"hindi ko alam", madalas tinatamad na ako mag-isip kaya eto tuloy, wala na ako maisip. hay...bad karma. haha
hopefully, tumalas ulit ang aking memory at utak in general sa aking pagbabalik-eskwela. i welcome all those cerebrally-stimulating activities. go, pasulatin nyo ako, paisipin nyo ako ng malalim, tanungin nyo ko ng mga bagay na pag-iisipan ko talaga. yung tipong hindi ka makakatulog pag hindi mo maisip ang sagot. or yung 1 linggo mong pag-iisipan kung papaniwalaan mo ba sya o hindi. invoke the spirits! ay mali, ano na sinasabi ko.
eh paano na yan, ngayon pa lang disillusioned na ako sa solair. hay pero sabi ko nga, 2 saturdays pa lang ako pumapasok. let's see...
ok fine, makapal lang talaga ang mukha ko. feeling ko writer ako and im having that writer's block. yeah right, as if naman ang galing kong magsulat before eh, no?
pero dati naman nakakapagsulat ako ng [feeling ko] maayos ah. tapos dati kahit ordinaryong pangyayari lang sa buhay ko, nakukwento ko ng maayos. hanggang sa pinakamaliit na detalye ha. natutunan ko to sa 199.1 eh. thick description baga. kaya na-appreciate ko ang ginawa namin sa paper namin kay aquino. ikwento mo ba naman ang mga pangyayari sa edsa dos. at hindi lang basta kwento ha, dapat mailarawan mo din kung anong nafifeel mo sa oras na yun, kumusta ang environment, ano nangyayari sa paligid habang nakikipag-usap ka sa kaibigan mo, at marami pang iba. eh ilang araw yun di ba? so ayun, kaya kung magkwento ako [noon], hay maiimagine mo kung ano talaga nangyayari. pero ngayon, huhu...
ay, isang hypotheses ko nga pala. pumupurol na ang memory ko. di ba sabi nga nila pag hindi mo laging ginagamit ang utak mo, pumupurol ito? feeling ko nangyayari sa akin ngayon ang epekto nito.
argh, feeling ko nadevelop ko to sa dati kong trabaho (gosh, blamestorming, thanks vhang hehe). pero feeling ko talaga kasi pag naiiinis ako dati sa mga taong tanong ng tanong, ang sagot ko hindi ko alam. kung may kausap akong hindi ko gusto, i would pretend na hindi ko alam ang itatanong nya. magaling akong magtanga-tangahan. eh syempre di ba, to cut the inquiry and the conversation, eh di magkunwari ka na lang na hindi mo alam. hanggang yun nasanay na ako sa kaka-"hindi ko alam", madalas tinatamad na ako mag-isip kaya eto tuloy, wala na ako maisip. hay...bad karma. haha
hopefully, tumalas ulit ang aking memory at utak in general sa aking pagbabalik-eskwela. i welcome all those cerebrally-stimulating activities. go, pasulatin nyo ako, paisipin nyo ako ng malalim, tanungin nyo ko ng mga bagay na pag-iisipan ko talaga. yung tipong hindi ka makakatulog pag hindi mo maisip ang sagot. or yung 1 linggo mong pag-iisipan kung papaniwalaan mo ba sya o hindi. invoke the spirits! ay mali, ano na sinasabi ko.
eh paano na yan, ngayon pa lang disillusioned na ako sa solair. hay pero sabi ko nga, 2 saturdays pa lang ako pumapasok. let's see...
Monday, June 25, 2007
a different kind of break
I’ve been attending classes for 2 weeks now and I could say that it’s a refreshing way of spending my Saturdays. The first Saturday was nice, despite the heat due to a sudden current interruption. Expectations were set and Im excited with writing papers again. But the second Saturday was disappointing, from classmates who ask non-related questions just for the sake of reciting to lecture notes that look like they were just ripped from the internet, Im starting to think that my undergraduate classes were more profound. Im hoping that in the next few Saturdays, the lectures and class discussions would turn out...better.
===================
me and my friends from work went to the beach last sunday to have our huling hirit sa tag-ulan aka SOAP girls annual outing (ako pinakabagong myembro) aka ina's pre-birthday celebration aka pakikipamista sa san juan.
it was a welcome treat from the piling stress at work. everything went fine except for the hellish traffic flow and the dizzying traffic instructions from people in san juan (tama ba?).
and aside from swimming, what do you usually do when you go to the beach?
.......pig out and take a lot of pictures!!!!!
the unbearable lightness of being
this is the layp!
===================
me and my friends from work went to the beach last sunday to have our huling hirit sa tag-ulan aka SOAP girls annual outing (ako pinakabagong myembro) aka ina's pre-birthday celebration aka pakikipamista sa san juan.
it was a welcome treat from the piling stress at work. everything went fine except for the hellish traffic flow and the dizzying traffic instructions from people in san juan (tama ba?).
and aside from swimming, what do you usually do when you go to the beach?
.......pig out and take a lot of pictures!!!!!
the unbearable lightness of being
this is the layp!
Sunday, June 03, 2007
online quiz
its time for those online quizzes once again =)
one of my friends from work was asking me if i believe in dreams because she was having repeated dreams about something and she's afraid that it might one day happen. i said that in my case, my dreams are most of the time the opposite of what happens so im not really the type who would allow dreams to affect my life. but i think that dreams are interesting so i took a dream test to find out what my dreams mean. and according to the 41-item questionnaire:
You're a Mastery!
The Dream Interpretation Test
Brought to you by Tickle
You're dreaming about maximizing opportunities and achieving well-deserved success. This means that in some area of your waking life, you are adequately prepared and things are working out just the way you want.
uy talaga? feeling ko hindi masyado
one of my friends from work was asking me if i believe in dreams because she was having repeated dreams about something and she's afraid that it might one day happen. i said that in my case, my dreams are most of the time the opposite of what happens so im not really the type who would allow dreams to affect my life. but i think that dreams are interesting so i took a dream test to find out what my dreams mean. and according to the 41-item questionnaire:
You're a Mastery!
The Dream Interpretation Test
Brought to you by Tickle
You're dreaming about maximizing opportunities and achieving well-deserved success. This means that in some area of your waking life, you are adequately prepared and things are working out just the way you want.
uy talaga? feeling ko hindi masyado
Monday, May 28, 2007
world wide web
i got this from ala paredes. google-ing one's name =)
and no, its not about narcissism, its more of plain curiosity. its just a matter of wanting to know if i exist in the world wide web.
and so i typed in, lxxx xxxx pxxxxxxx. result: 2 hits haha sige na nga. courtesy of j5 days pa yan ha.
fast forward to 2007. sa kabilang bahagi ng mundo, may tao din palang gumagawa nito.
he types in: pasaraba. his motivation? he wants to connect to his relatives in the far east.
you see, our surname is a unique one. kokonti lang ang may ganitong apelyido sa buong mundo. kaya kung sinuman ang lumabas sa net na kaapelyido ko, malamang iisa ang pinanggalingan namin.
thats why my family was really thrilled when we got a mail from my cousin whom ive never seen since birth. the family moved to the states when they were still kids. the parents come home once in a while but they (the kids) never had the chance to come back and visit.
eerr..there was one time pala when he almost met my older siblings. his ship docked in subic but too bad, they didnt get the schedule right. so sorry na lang.
i worked in the armed forces for 3 years. yearly, we participate in bilateral wargaming exercises with US troops. pero sorry pa rin, hindi kami nagkita.
buti na lang may friendster, na sa tingin ko ay parang NSO sa lawak ng database. lahat yata ng tao may record dito.
anyway, im really happy for the gift of the internet and friendster. brings long lost relatives together.
and no, its not about narcissism, its more of plain curiosity. its just a matter of wanting to know if i exist in the world wide web.
and so i typed in, lxxx xxxx pxxxxxxx. result: 2 hits haha sige na nga. courtesy of j5 days pa yan ha.
fast forward to 2007. sa kabilang bahagi ng mundo, may tao din palang gumagawa nito.
he types in: pasaraba. his motivation? he wants to connect to his relatives in the far east.
you see, our surname is a unique one. kokonti lang ang may ganitong apelyido sa buong mundo. kaya kung sinuman ang lumabas sa net na kaapelyido ko, malamang iisa ang pinanggalingan namin.
thats why my family was really thrilled when we got a mail from my cousin whom ive never seen since birth. the family moved to the states when they were still kids. the parents come home once in a while but they (the kids) never had the chance to come back and visit.
eerr..there was one time pala when he almost met my older siblings. his ship docked in subic but too bad, they didnt get the schedule right. so sorry na lang.
i worked in the armed forces for 3 years. yearly, we participate in bilateral wargaming exercises with US troops. pero sorry pa rin, hindi kami nagkita.
buti na lang may friendster, na sa tingin ko ay parang NSO sa lawak ng database. lahat yata ng tao may record dito.
anyway, im really happy for the gift of the internet and friendster. brings long lost relatives together.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
syet celeb!
before, it was theater
now, its blogging
haha my sister is making waves. she was featured blogger of the week in inquirer. wala lang, not really a big deal but she is my sister so its a big deal for me haha
read more here
now, its blogging
haha my sister is making waves. she was featured blogger of the week in inquirer. wala lang, not really a big deal but she is my sister so its a big deal for me haha
read more here
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
changes
Evolution is an imperfect and often violent process.
A battle between what exists and what is yet to become.
Amidst all these, morality loses its meaning
The question between what is good and evil becomes one simple choice, survive or perish
----- HEROES
-------------------------
wala lang. feel ko lang baguhin template ko. Nawala tuloy ang mga links ko =(
A battle between what exists and what is yet to become.
Amidst all these, morality loses its meaning
The question between what is good and evil becomes one simple choice, survive or perish
----- HEROES
-------------------------
wala lang. feel ko lang baguhin template ko. Nawala tuloy ang mga links ko =(
Monday, May 14, 2007
boredom
boring din pala pag walang ginagawa. =)
this is my realization after having 2 whole days of well...idle time.
i used to love these moments. but now, man, its tiring! nakakapagod matulog! nakakabore kumain ng kumain! nakakabobo manood ng tv maghapon! (syempre pagkatapos bumoto)nababato na ako!
----------------------
excited na ako sa pagdating ng martes. im looking forward to having my nose and ears bleed. at least, even for just a week, my dream of getting a feel of how it is to be an atenean will be realized. syet, ang babaw ko! haha hmmm....tingnan nga natin.
---------------------
yey! estudyante na ulit ako! im going back to up this june. this time, seryosohang pag-aaral na ito. sayang naman ang tuition pag bumagsak or nag-drop ako. oble, namiss kita! namiss ko ang kasimplehan ng buhay up. namiss ko ang kayabangan ng mga tao dun. pero ang pinaka-namiss ko, ang pag-iisip ng mga taong nangangarap baguhin ang mundo.
after the exam, of course, i prayed that id be accepted. sayang naman ang 300 kung hindi ako pumasa no. at syempre, nakakahiya din haha
i was asking myself why i would still want to go back to up. bakit ko gugustuhing bumalik sa unibersidad na may bulok na facilities? pwede naman akong maglasalle lalo na at P100 lang naman ang pagitan ng tuition per unit. pwede din naman akong mag-ateneo kung magtitipid lang ako. (thinks: pwede din kaya akong mag-aral abroad?)
aside from the yabang reasons, i realized that what i like most about up is the kind of thinking it instills in its students. kaya ang rason ko kung bakit gusto kong bumalik sa up? gusto kong magrecharge! gusto kong ibalik ang idealism na unti unti nang nawawala sa akin! sure this may not help me climb the corporate ladder fast but this is the thing that will drive me to do better. so sana, marecharge ako =)
this is my realization after having 2 whole days of well...idle time.
i used to love these moments. but now, man, its tiring! nakakapagod matulog! nakakabore kumain ng kumain! nakakabobo manood ng tv maghapon! (syempre pagkatapos bumoto)nababato na ako!
----------------------
excited na ako sa pagdating ng martes. im looking forward to having my nose and ears bleed. at least, even for just a week, my dream of getting a feel of how it is to be an atenean will be realized. syet, ang babaw ko! haha hmmm....tingnan nga natin.
---------------------
yey! estudyante na ulit ako! im going back to up this june. this time, seryosohang pag-aaral na ito. sayang naman ang tuition pag bumagsak or nag-drop ako. oble, namiss kita! namiss ko ang kasimplehan ng buhay up. namiss ko ang kayabangan ng mga tao dun. pero ang pinaka-namiss ko, ang pag-iisip ng mga taong nangangarap baguhin ang mundo.
after the exam, of course, i prayed that id be accepted. sayang naman ang 300 kung hindi ako pumasa no. at syempre, nakakahiya din haha
i was asking myself why i would still want to go back to up. bakit ko gugustuhing bumalik sa unibersidad na may bulok na facilities? pwede naman akong maglasalle lalo na at P100 lang naman ang pagitan ng tuition per unit. pwede din naman akong mag-ateneo kung magtitipid lang ako. (thinks: pwede din kaya akong mag-aral abroad?)
aside from the yabang reasons, i realized that what i like most about up is the kind of thinking it instills in its students. kaya ang rason ko kung bakit gusto kong bumalik sa up? gusto kong magrecharge! gusto kong ibalik ang idealism na unti unti nang nawawala sa akin! sure this may not help me climb the corporate ladder fast but this is the thing that will drive me to do better. so sana, marecharge ako =)
Saturday, May 12, 2007
sabado
1130 ng umaga.
nakaupo ako loob ng cubicle. nakatingin sa pc. kakatapos naming pag-usapan ang plano kung paano isasakatuparan ang pagrerevise sa isang manual. nagawa ko na din ang report ko. hmm...ano pa ba kaylangan kong gawin?
makapagbasa nga muna ng news.
http://www.inquirer.net. ay boring ang news.
ah, magbabasa na lang ako ng matinong article!
http://www.haringliwanag.pansitan.net
opening site....
smartfilter.
the site you requested is blocked.
please contact your system administrator for site review.
HUWAT! putik, natunugan na ng ISD ang aking libangan! hay, pano na ang periodic dose of wisdom ko? huhuhu
Kainis! Blocked na sa ofis ang blog ni jim paredes. sad face...
nakaupo ako loob ng cubicle. nakatingin sa pc. kakatapos naming pag-usapan ang plano kung paano isasakatuparan ang pagrerevise sa isang manual. nagawa ko na din ang report ko. hmm...ano pa ba kaylangan kong gawin?
makapagbasa nga muna ng news.
http://www.inquirer.net. ay boring ang news.
ah, magbabasa na lang ako ng matinong article!
http://www.haringliwanag.pansitan.net
opening site....
smartfilter.
the site you requested is blocked.
please contact your system administrator for site review.
HUWAT! putik, natunugan na ng ISD ang aking libangan! hay, pano na ang periodic dose of wisdom ko? huhuhu
Kainis! Blocked na sa ofis ang blog ni jim paredes. sad face...
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
maligayang araw ng paggawa
alas-tres na ng madaling araw pero gising na gising pa rin ako. bakit hindi? walang pasok bukas dahil araw ng pagdiriwang ng mga manggagawa sa buong mundo.
pagkatapos ng 4 na taon ng pagtatrabaho, ano ang dapat kong ipagdiwang?
-----------
dahil ipit ang lunes sa dalawang araw na walang pasok, halos walang tao kanina sa opisina. tahimik! masaya haha minsan lang kasi maging tahimik sa opisina. madalas maingay! ewan ko ba, ang lalakas ng boses ng mga tao dun. malalaman mo kung ano ang pinag-uusapan nila ng nasa kabilang linya ng telepono. feeling mo tuloy nakikipakinig ka kahit hindi naman. tsismosa!
------------
ina and i were talking about mikaela fudolig's speech this afternoon. she responded to the forwarded email i sent to the group, with a note that reads: i guess the idea is not just for UP people but for every Filipino youth.
she said she had goosebumps while reading the speech. well, who wont? as usual, we had one of those (pa)profound discussions about idealism, adulthood and life. i dont know why but whenever we chat, we usually end up discussing about serious things in life.
told her that i loved the speech because its so young and so idealist. i remember that i once read an article written by a parent who has a kid who graduated from ateneo. she (or he, i couldnt remember if it was a father or a mother) noticed how the valedictory speech seemed like a rhetoric. she was a bit disappointed because she didnt see the youthful idealism that she expected to see from a person who is fresh from school and who is supposed to have fresh perspectives about the world. and she was asking, was an expensive atenean education worth it? i dont mean any offense because i know that there are a lot of idealist ateneans out there, who might be more idealist than me, but that article just came back to my mind while reading mikaela's speech. maybe if the mother could read mikaela's article now, she wont lose hope in the youth.
anyway, ina and i were talking about how idealism, in a way, gradually wears off during adulthood (at least in our experience). when youre fresh from college, you have these dreams about making a change, about holding on to the values you learned from college, about living a principled life, about defying the norm in the interest of truth, about serving your country, serving the people who sent you through school, about giving back to society. but as you work and live in a dynamic environment wherein people's minds are not as easy to understand and couldnt be explained by a single theory, you learn about a new concept, that of compromise. as you meddle with people who 'have been there', you learn that somehow, you need to reorient yourself in order to survive, that somehow, you have to sometimes 'relax' your personal rules a bit and you'll have new sets of principles. and as you immerse yourself longer, you slowly realize that the idealism is waning, that youre becoming more pragmatic. not that its a bad thing but sometimes, the guilt is there.
she was telling me that this kind of idealism is peculiar of up. that in la salle, people were more self-absorbed. that social consciousness is not a norm. i couldnt react because i dont have any friends from la salle aside from her and cams. and she said she also does not have friends from up aside from jen, dangs and me. and so we appreciate the interaction, the exchange of thoughts, the sharing of perspectives.
sometimes i feel shame for myself. nahihiya ako sa nakababatang sarili ko. i always dream about change and talk with my friends about making a change but it ends there. i always talk about wanting to volunteer for some NGO but that remains unrealized up to now. i dont have the bravery that mikaela is talking about. i cant defy the pressure to lead a comfortable life. im not making new roads. im not a trailblazer. im just a part of the mob, the majority who walks through the clean, cemented path built before me.
maybe its maslow's hierarchy of needs working here. maybe not. maybe using maslow is just a good justification of my actions but the truth is im on my way to failing my younger, idealist self from its dreams. i dont know. maybe. i hope not.
i really want to go back to school now.
pagkatapos ng 4 na taon ng pagtatrabaho, ano ang dapat kong ipagdiwang?
-----------
dahil ipit ang lunes sa dalawang araw na walang pasok, halos walang tao kanina sa opisina. tahimik! masaya haha minsan lang kasi maging tahimik sa opisina. madalas maingay! ewan ko ba, ang lalakas ng boses ng mga tao dun. malalaman mo kung ano ang pinag-uusapan nila ng nasa kabilang linya ng telepono. feeling mo tuloy nakikipakinig ka kahit hindi naman. tsismosa!
------------
ina and i were talking about mikaela fudolig's speech this afternoon. she responded to the forwarded email i sent to the group, with a note that reads: i guess the idea is not just for UP people but for every Filipino youth.
she said she had goosebumps while reading the speech. well, who wont? as usual, we had one of those (pa)profound discussions about idealism, adulthood and life. i dont know why but whenever we chat, we usually end up discussing about serious things in life.
told her that i loved the speech because its so young and so idealist. i remember that i once read an article written by a parent who has a kid who graduated from ateneo. she (or he, i couldnt remember if it was a father or a mother) noticed how the valedictory speech seemed like a rhetoric. she was a bit disappointed because she didnt see the youthful idealism that she expected to see from a person who is fresh from school and who is supposed to have fresh perspectives about the world. and she was asking, was an expensive atenean education worth it? i dont mean any offense because i know that there are a lot of idealist ateneans out there, who might be more idealist than me, but that article just came back to my mind while reading mikaela's speech. maybe if the mother could read mikaela's article now, she wont lose hope in the youth.
anyway, ina and i were talking about how idealism, in a way, gradually wears off during adulthood (at least in our experience). when youre fresh from college, you have these dreams about making a change, about holding on to the values you learned from college, about living a principled life, about defying the norm in the interest of truth, about serving your country, serving the people who sent you through school, about giving back to society. but as you work and live in a dynamic environment wherein people's minds are not as easy to understand and couldnt be explained by a single theory, you learn about a new concept, that of compromise. as you meddle with people who 'have been there', you learn that somehow, you need to reorient yourself in order to survive, that somehow, you have to sometimes 'relax' your personal rules a bit and you'll have new sets of principles. and as you immerse yourself longer, you slowly realize that the idealism is waning, that youre becoming more pragmatic. not that its a bad thing but sometimes, the guilt is there.
she was telling me that this kind of idealism is peculiar of up. that in la salle, people were more self-absorbed. that social consciousness is not a norm. i couldnt react because i dont have any friends from la salle aside from her and cams. and she said she also does not have friends from up aside from jen, dangs and me. and so we appreciate the interaction, the exchange of thoughts, the sharing of perspectives.
sometimes i feel shame for myself. nahihiya ako sa nakababatang sarili ko. i always dream about change and talk with my friends about making a change but it ends there. i always talk about wanting to volunteer for some NGO but that remains unrealized up to now. i dont have the bravery that mikaela is talking about. i cant defy the pressure to lead a comfortable life. im not making new roads. im not a trailblazer. im just a part of the mob, the majority who walks through the clean, cemented path built before me.
maybe its maslow's hierarchy of needs working here. maybe not. maybe using maslow is just a good justification of my actions but the truth is im on my way to failing my younger, idealist self from its dreams. i dont know. maybe. i hope not.
i really want to go back to school now.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
kiddieland
second stop, ang destinasyon ng mga bata at mga pusong bata. ang lupain ng mga hayop na cute, prinsesa, prinsipe at kastilyo. yay!
mukha ba akong excited?
pati bintana ng tren, hugis tenga ng daga =)
goofing around..
mabuhay ang mga musikerong pilipino! manong, itayo ang bandila ng pilipinas! nakakatuwa palang marining ang "bahay kubo" habang tinutugtog sa bansang banyaga.
now, this is really freaky. how would you react if you hear merlin speaking in...uhm...cantonese?
its really weird man! pare, nakakabangag!
still goofing around =p
mukha ba akong excited?
pati bintana ng tren, hugis tenga ng daga =)
goofing around..
mabuhay ang mga musikerong pilipino! manong, itayo ang bandila ng pilipinas! nakakatuwa palang marining ang "bahay kubo" habang tinutugtog sa bansang banyaga.
now, this is really freaky. how would you react if you hear merlin speaking in...uhm...cantonese?
its really weird man! pare, nakakabangag!
still goofing around =p
Monday, April 09, 2007
on hiatus
grabe, nasa ika-labingtatlong araw na ko ng bakasyon at nasasanay na ko sa buhay na walang ginagawa! parang hindi na ako marunong mag-isip, magsulat at magtrabaho! hahaha sarap ng buhay!
biruin mo, inabutan na ko ng lunes sa pagpupuyat pero eto at wala pa kong balak matulog dahil wala pa ring pasok bukas. yahoo!
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isang taon na pala akong wala sa afp. bilis talaga ng panahon. buti na lang at minsan hindi ako logical mag-isip dahil kung hindi, siguro andun pa rin ako. buti na lang napikon ako at naibigay agad ang ginawa kong resignation letter dahil kung hindi....naku babatukan ko na sarili ko haha
pero ok lang din. madami akong natutunan at nakilalang bagong mga kaibigan. syempre kaakibat ng kalungkutan ang mga kasiyahan sa buhay. salamat afp...
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sa kauna-unahang pagkakataon, nakapagbyahe kami ng mga magulang at 2 kong kapatid sa labas ng bansa (too bad for you kuy haha). and what do you get when you have a hyper mom, a hot-tempered father and 2 cool sisters? a fun (mis)adventure! here are some of the pictures:
biruin mo, inabutan na ko ng lunes sa pagpupuyat pero eto at wala pa kong balak matulog dahil wala pa ring pasok bukas. yahoo!
------------
isang taon na pala akong wala sa afp. bilis talaga ng panahon. buti na lang at minsan hindi ako logical mag-isip dahil kung hindi, siguro andun pa rin ako. buti na lang napikon ako at naibigay agad ang ginawa kong resignation letter dahil kung hindi....naku babatukan ko na sarili ko haha
pero ok lang din. madami akong natutunan at nakilalang bagong mga kaibigan. syempre kaakibat ng kalungkutan ang mga kasiyahan sa buhay. salamat afp...
-------------
sa kauna-unahang pagkakataon, nakapagbyahe kami ng mga magulang at 2 kong kapatid sa labas ng bansa (too bad for you kuy haha). and what do you get when you have a hyper mom, a hot-tempered father and 2 cool sisters? a fun (mis)adventure! here are some of the pictures:
eto sinasabi ko...(asan ako? photographer ang tawag sa akin)
uy grabe, nakangiti tatay ko. excited din haha
hindi ko rin alam kung bat may ipis eh. ay ndi pala sya ipis...
sa bibig ng pating
dikya ba ika mo? o eto..
opo mga kaibigan, lumabas ang karuwagan ko. duwag ako! sa tayog ng ferris wheel, sa sahig ako napaupo haha
tanawin mula sa cable car
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