Goodbye

One of my closest friends asked me about you.  Whether you've made contact, like an alien.  I said no.  Probably that's for the better?  I still don't know.  When it comes to life experiences, we learn mostly from hindsight, don't we?

I told her I will message you on Christmas.  Or New Year.  Because you were a big part of my 2015 anyway.

She asked if you have a concept of Christmas.  I said yes.  You, you smart ass you.  I told her how your family celebrates Christmas.  How your entire village celebrates Christmas.  I forgot to tell her that you usually even have a cake for Christmas.

I told her more about you.  About how you view religion.  And how we agree about religions.

Sometimes I wish we should have met earlier.  Like what you would usually say and I would usually negate.  If we did, Im afraid I would have fallen for you.  I dont know if you would have felt the same way.  Or would have been bored with me.  I wouldnt know.  We definitely wont know.

It's Monday.  By this time last week, I was traveling the entire day.  From Boracay to Kalibo.  From Kalibo to Manila.  From Manila to Singapore.

On that day at the airport, I thought I've misplaced and lost my phone.  One of the saddest things I thought of if that did happen, was that Id lose all my tangible reminders of you.  Without your messages, without the archives of our conversations, you will solely reside in my memory.  And that almost made me cry.  More than the phtos from my trip.  More than the photos from the wedding.  More than the fact that the phone was given to me.  Our conversations hold a special place in this gadget.

I also thought that maybe, just maybe, that was a sign that I should let go.  But I found my phone.  I wasnt ready to let go.  Not yet.

Today, a week ago, was the last time that we talked.  The last time that we bid each other well.  The last time that we were 15 miles away.  Now, when I look at your profile, it says 2580 miles away.  So far from each other.  Geographically. Physically.

It's weird isn't it?  One day, we were so close to each other.  Hugging.  Kissing.  The next day, we act like we dont exist from each other's lives.  Im sure if you're here, we would make sense of this again. Like how we would rationalize trivial things.

But then again, you're not here.  We're thousands of miles apart.  Im not sure if we're still going to see each other again.  Maybe.  But most probably not.

In the meantime, we say goodbye.